Dear [circle one: Sir or Madam/Valued Customer/Alumni and Friends/Ms. Hilton],
We [circle one: regret to/feel it's our obligation to/are required by law to/hope you don't sue when we] inform you that we suffered a security breach [circle all that apply: last week/ last month/last quarter/let's just say "a while ago"] on our computer systems. You can rest assured that we [circle one: have fixed/feel like we're close to identifying who might be able to help us figure out who to call to help us fix] the problem.
As a result of the attack by [circle one: underground/shadowy/foreign] hacking syndicates, some private information about you may have been [circle a few: compromised/misplaced/ sold to identity thieves on the black market/auctioned off on eBay]. The personally identifying information that we lost may include your [circle all that apply: name/address/phone number/credit card number/Social Security number/tax return information/criminal record/ PIN numbers/iPod playlists/peculiar affinity for Thomas Kinkade paintings/unfortunate incident in Guadalajara during college/cell phone number/car keys/voting history/American Idol voting history/health-care records/bank records/entire life savings].
CSO Magazine certainly must know that's its been tough for chief security officers, who,so used to email, have had to re-learn the lost art of letter writing in order to find the right words to tell people their data has been stolen by hackers or thrown in a dumpster.
