Boattail Racer, the $350 Wooden Toy Car

There's no doubt that the Boattail Racer is gorgeous, its "aerodynamic" lines recalling automobiles designed before the wind tunnel, built to look fast rather than be fast. What is also certain is that it takes a lot of promotional bullshit to get away with selling a wooden toy car for $350. Yes, $350.

Let's decode the marketing speak:

The Boattail Racer is handmade from materials that time cannot easily erode.

What?

The wooden bodywork is sculpted from rugged 13 ply Baltic birch.

It's plywood

The muscular stance comes courtesy of the 77.5 millimeter carnelian-core industrial grade wheels, which float effortlessly on precision bearings.

In-line skate wheels with hippy-stones inside.

Solid stainless steel axles and fasteners ensure faithful service for generations to come.

Ah, stainless steel, second only to gold and platinum in its preciousness.

Your Boattail Racer arrives protected by a custom archive box handcrafted from black-core 4 ply acid-free museum board.

Comes in a cardboard box.

And that, ladies and gents, is how you take a toy car made from plywood and inflate its price tenfold. It even comes with a certificate to remind you how authentically you were swindled.

Boattail Racer [Auditorium Toys Co via Uncrate]

See Also:

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• Photos: Tiny Smart Car Secured with Giant Bike-Lock