Villain lairs of vintage Bollywood

*Not bad as architectural criticism goes.

Beth loves Bollywood in the cultural gutter

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The one resource villains consistently have over heroes is unique, private spaces for hedonism and violence: the lair. The hero never holds court in a hall filled with alcohol, flunkies, and a dance floor. Especially in recent years, he might be as rich as a gold smuggler or arms dealer, but his funds come from legal (or at least uninteresting) sources. He might go to nightclubs, but they’re usually public and designed to look generically cool rather than individualized, secret hangouts. He’s too goody-goody to invite dancing girls into his bed, and he certainly doesn’t have Scaramanga-style mirrors or booby-trapped rooms at his disposal. The lair reads as embodiment of manic, insatiable sinning, with resources that reflect and enable greed, pride, lust, gluttony, and wrath.

If you remember Mola Ram’s arena in Temple of Doom, you’ve had a taste of what Hindi films have offered over the decades. Maybe actor Amrish Puri, who often played eye-bugging baddies in Hindi films both before and after ToD, shared some ideas with the art department. I can’t name a Bollywood film in which still-beating hearts are ripped out, but plenty of them have giant religious statuary, chained slaves, and death traps.

Join me for a guided tour of Bollywood’s best villain lairs in song. (Oh c’mon, you knew there would be musical numbers.)...