Gallery: Pentagon Launches Offensive Against Puppies, Kittens
01killer-kittens
On Aug. 31, Army Spc. Kevin Shumaker, 24, died of rabies after being bitten by a stray dog in Afghanistan. Shumaker was the first U.S. soldier to die of rabies since the Vietnam War. In response, the Army [launched a public education offensive](http://www.stripes.com/news/army/army-seeking-troops-bitten-by-stray-animals-following-rabies-death-1.158120), hanging up posters like the one above that warn of the deadly viruses lurking within even the cuddliest of creatures. You see, dogs aren't the only rabies carriers. As the U.S. Army Public Health Command notes, "EVEN KITTENS CAN BE DEADLY!" In other words, Fluffy here ain't your average lolcat. *Image: Army Public Health Command*
025-6-bites-per-day
5.6 Bites Per Day ----------------- According to [a study released by the Armed Forces Health Surveillance Center](http://www.afhsc.mil/viewMSMR?file=2011/v18_n09.pdf#Page=12) in September, 20,522 service members sustained animal bites between January 2001 and December 2010. That's more than 5.6 bites per day, if you're keeping score at home. The vast majority of the troops were bitten on U.S. soil, where rabies is rare. (So rare, in fact, that Spc. Shumaker is the only U.S. citizen to die of the disease this year.) But, of the 643 servicemen and women who were bit on the battlefield, only 117 received rabies vaccines and only 25 received the treatment that would be necessary for recovery had they actually contracted the disease. [Army medical officials are currently retracing their steps](http://www.stripes.com/news/army/army-seeking-troops-bitten-by-stray-animals-following-rabies-death-1.158120) to make sure there aren't any soldiers other than Spc. Shumaker who were bitten by rabid animals. *Image: Army Public Health Command*
03covert-assassin-pups
Covert Assassin Pups -------------------- Don't be fooled by the floppy ears, soft bellies, and tiny paws — these puppies are harbingers of death. They aim to destroy, one nip at a time. And there's no way you can tell because they're masters of disguise: "Not all animals with rabies look sick or act strange," the ad tells us. So keep away from anything that wants to play fetch or lick your face because it will probably kill you. *Image: Army Public Health Command*
04mascots-no-more
Mascots, No More ---------------- The Uniform Code of Military Justice prohibits soldiers from “adopting as pets or mascots, caring for, or feeding any type of domestic or wild animal.” As the Armed Forces Health Surveillance System study points out, "even minor animal bite injuries can have serious consequences — particularly bites inflicted by wild animals (including bats, foxes, skunks, and raccoons), feral cats and dogs, and pets with unknown rabies vaccination statuses." The Army Public Health Command didn't provide any information about how these posters were made, but it sure looks like this soldier is in direct violation of the very rule he is advertising. It hardly seems fair that he gets to hold a puppy while everyone else has to release their pet bats and rats into the wild. *Image: Army Public Health Command*
05filthy-bloodsucking-mosquitoes
Filthy Bloodsucking Mosquitoes ------------------------------ Viet Cong soldiers weren't the only shadows lurking in the jungle during the Vietnam War. Soldiers contended with tigers, snakes, leeches, spiders, and just about every other bloodthirsty member of the animal kingdom. Apparently the mosquitoes were particularly vicious, prompting the army to publish a medical bulletin that featured this helpful cartoon. *Image: Stimson Library, U.S. Army Academy of Health Sciences*
06hungry-crocs
Hungry Crocs ------------ Saltwater crocodiles can weigh up to 2,000 pounds and grow to up to 20 feet long. And they’re opportunistic hunters. On Feb. 19, 1945, the Japanese Army found this out the hard way. Allied troops landed on Ramree Island, located off the coast of Burma, and attacked the Japanese stronghold. The Japanese were backed into a marshy, swampy forest full of saltwater crocodiles, mosquitoes, and scorpions. The Allied troops supposedly begged the Japanese soldiers to surrender, but stationed themselves around the water to prevent them from escaping. Bruce Wright, a naturalist who was fighting for the British, said this of what happened next: > “That night was the most horrible that any member of the M.L. \[motor launch\] crews ever experienced. The scattered rifle shots in the pitch black swamp punctured by the screams of wounded men crushed in the jaws of huge reptiles, and the blurred worrying sound of spinning crocodiles made a cacophony of hell that has rarely been duplicated on earth. At dawn the vultures arrived to clean up what the crocodiles had left … Of about 1,000 Japanese soldiers that entered the swamps of Ramree, only about 20 were found alive.” These numbers are disputed — some reports say 400 men entered the swamp, others say up to 1,000 — but regardless, the Guinness Book of World Records has called the event “the greatest disaster suffered from animals” of all time. *Image: Flickr/[Fvanrenterghem](http://www.flickr.com/photos/fvanrenterghem/)*
07giant-camel-spiders
Giant Camel Spiders ------------------- These are *solifugae* — the dreaded camel spiders of Iraq. According to legend, they grow to more than a foot long, scamper at a rate of 25 miles per hour, and hollow out the contents of a camel's stomach to lay their eggs. When they don't get their fill of camel, they prey on humans and inject their venomous saliva into our glands. Turns out none of this is true. Actually, the spiders typically have a leg span of five or six inches (though they really can grow up to 12 inches long), are only capable of speeds of *maybe* 10 mph, and are not poisonous. I still wouldn't want to wake up with one of these guys in my sleeping bag [like this soldier did in Baghdad](http://www.snopes.com/photos/bugs/camelspider.asp#photo). *Image: Flickr/[David~O](http://www.flickr.com/photos/8106459@N07/)*
08spider-drones
Spider Drones ------------- Oh god, please don't let this come true. In 2008, BAE Systems promised to one day unleash [swarms of these spider drones](http://stag-komodo.wired.com/dangerroom/2008/04/usually-our-dys/). They would fly and crawl through places that humans can't reach to collect intel. I'm not sure I'd want to see one of these crawl up next to me any more than I would a camel spider, even if it is man-made. *Image: BAE Systems*
