Gallery: On Etsy, Thor Is the God of Thunder ... And Crochet
01thor-crochet-1
When you get home from seeing *[Thor: The Dark World](http://stag-komodo.wired.com/underwire/2013/11/thor-dark-world-review/)* after its opening this weekend, we know what you’ll be thinking: "What kind of nerdy, handmade paraphernalia can I buy to go along with this immense love that has just swelled in my heart?” (We know this because this was also our first thought.) And you, like us, will plumb the depths of Etsy and learn that Thor is more than the god of thunder: He's the god of crochet, kitsch, and slightly risque light switches. Read on. Crocheted Thor Hat and Cocoon Set, $57.49 ----------------------------------------- Is there anything funnier than swaddling your helpless, drooling infant in the clothing of a superstrong god? No, I tell you, there is nothing. Seller Lilydotcrochet does have [a Hulk version](http://www.etsy.com/listing/95859302/crochet-incredible-hulk-hat-and-cocoon) of this cocoon-and-hat set that could come close, but then again, have you ever changed an infant's diaper? While she is screaming to the point of aneurysm? In that scenario, a Hulk cosplay is pretty spot-on. Runner up: [this similar (and similarly adorable) set](http://www.etsy.com/listing/150580871/thor-baby-set-with-helmet-hammer-diaper) from crochetherodesigns, which includes a diaper cover and a mini-Mjölnir. *—DEVON MALONEY*
02il-570xN.356785015-rimm
__Thor Hammerhead Shark T-Shirt, $13.00__ ----------------------------------------- Yes, it's a hammer pun, but the important thing about [this shirt](http://www.etsy.com/listing/92779988/thor-shark-hammer-time-available-s-l-xl?ref=shop_home_active&ga_search_query=thor) (which is also available in [ladies' sizes](http://www.etsy.com/listing/64445717/thor-tee-shark-tshirt-hammerhead) and as a [print](http://www.etsy.com/listing/109748987/thor-shark-avengers-hammerhead-hammer?ref=shop_home_active)) is that it is a picture of *Thor hitting someone with a shark*, and that is *great*. In fact, the only thing that would make this better would be Thor hitting someone with a shark *in space*, which actually happened in Jason Aaron's recent run of *Thor: God of Thunder*. [Sharks: never not awesome.](stag-komodo.wired.com/underwire/2013/08/international-shark-week/) *—RACHEL EDIDIN*
03thor-drawing-jacobmadethis
["Mighty Thor" Fan Art, $5.00](http://www.etsy.com/listing/118279739/mighty-thor) --------------------------------------------------------------------------------- This spectacular impressionistic rendering of the God of Thunder was created by Jacob LeBeau, a.k.a. Etsy vendor [JacobDIDthis](http://www.etsy.com/shop/JacobDIDthis) (relationship to pop/hip-hop producer [Mike WiLL Made It](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mike_Will_Made_It) unknown). Jacob is 10 years old and lives in Charleston, South Carolina, where he draws pictures of his favorite superheroes and cartoons to sell for convention money. Last year, he raised enough to go to [Dragon Con](http://www.dragoncon.org/) in Atlanta; now he’s fundraising for his own [Artists Alley](http://stag-komodo.wired.com/underwire/2013/10/new-york-comic-con-art-2013/) booths at future cons. What kind of monster wouldn’t want to patron such a noble business? *—DEVON MALONEY*
04thor-underwear
__[Dr. Horrible/Thor Underwear, $15.00](http://www.etsy.com/listing/121372828/dr-horriblethor-underwear-size-x-large)__ ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Sporting an [oft-quoted line](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t7bdr6fjg-k) from Joss Whedon's popular musical tragicomedy *Dr. Horrible*, this underwear offers two possibilities: Either you don't understand that throwing in an actual hammer kills the gag, or you're insinuating that Thor has a penis that was forged by his father in the heart of a dying star, and which he now uses to fly around and fight giants. Either way, I'm pretty confident that this, specifically, is why we can't have nice things. *—RACHEL EDIDIN*
05thor-lightswitch
__[Thor Light Switch Plate, $14.95](http://www.etsy.com/listing/161885607/made-to-order-thor-light-switch-plate)__ ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Now, [THIS](http://www.etsy.com/listing/161885607/made-to-order-thor-light-switch-plate) is how you do a sophomoric penis joke. Well played. If Thor's not your bag, Etsy vendor [Intergalactic Design](http://www.etsy.com/shop/IntergalacticDesign) offers a range of superheroes and villains, including [Lady Sif](http://www.etsy.com/listing/118135514/super-hero-light-switch-plate-sif). I have a Dr. Doom version of this installed in my office, and it remains the best $14.95 I've ever spent. *—RACHEL EDIDIN*
06thor-flash-phone-case
["Thor" iPhone 4/4s Case, $12.99](http://www.etsy.com/listing/153906333/iphone-4-4s-case-cover-thor-iphone-4-4s) ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- *Liiiisten.* Granted, as the God of Thunder, Thor can be easily mis-associated with a plethora of magnetospheric phenomena, so we *maybe* understand the confusion in incorrectly calling him God of Lightning (as [some fans have done](http://www.etsy.com/listing/158074139/thor-god-of-lightning-brass-lightning)). But this Chinese vendor (who also sells [a similarly misguided case here](http://www.etsy.com/listing/157243856/iphone-4-4s-case-cover-thor-iphone-4-4s)) has simply gone too far. [We’ll just leave this fact-checking link here and be done with it.](“https://www.google.com/search?safe=off&site=&tbm=isch&source=hp&biw=1206&bih=627&q=the+flash+logo&oq=the+flash+logo&gs_l=img.3..0l10.173.2602.0.2819.16.12.1.3.3.0.135.1036.4j8.12.0....0...1ac.1.31.img..4.12.567.3VWV72xfS5g”) (Double-negative points for the bonus-round symbol screw-up: [a Deathly Hallows charm?](http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/Sign_of_the_Deathly_Hallows)) *—DEVON MALONEY*
07thor-loki-bracelet
__["You Were Made to Be Ruled" Bracelet, $17.62](http://www.etsy.com/listing/160850775/you-were-made-to-be-ruled-loki-thor)__ ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- If you're looking for a way to flag both your fandom and your proclivity for consensual power exchange, this leather wrap bracelet -- which features Loki's "You were made to be ruled" quote from *The Avengers* in the character's signature gold and green -- will let you cover both bases with one surprisingly tasteful accessory. *—RACHEL EDIDIN*
08thor-loki-necklace
[Loki Hearts pendant necklace, $25.00](http://www.etsy.com/listing/129978331/loki-hearts-pendant-necklace-lokid) ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- An alternate take on one's relationship with the Trickster God: "Delicate, Golden, and Full of Feelings." (I wouldn't bet on it or anything, but wouldn’t it be cool – and infinitely appropriate, symbolically speaking – if this necklace also doubled as a bottle opener?) *—DEVON MALONEY*
09thor-cookie-cutter
[Handmade Plastic Mjölnir Cookie-Cutter, $12.99](http://www.etsy.com/listing/167669366/thor-hammer-mjolnir-cookie-cutter-great) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Can you imagine what birthday parties and holidays would have been like had Thor gotten his hands on one of these "cookie/bread/cheese/soft fruit cutters" as a child? Kind of makes you understand where Loki's coming from. Still, whatever this thing gets used on probably tastes *delicious* dipped in mead. *And* the plastic is eco-friendly! *—DEVON MALONEY*
10thor-loki-my-little-pony
__[Loki Pony, $125.00](http://www.etsy.com/listing/161303518/loki-pony)__ ------------------------------------------------------------------------- On one hand: still rolling my eyes at the trend of making *My Little Pony* versions of EVERYTHING EVER. On the other hand: one time in an actual Norse Myth, Loki turned himself into a mare in heat to lure away a horse belonging to giant contractors, then subsequently gave birth to Odin's eight-legged steed [Sleipnir](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sleipnir), so a Loki pony actually makes sense. Kinda. *——RACHEL EDIDIN*
